Our life is a series of roles: daughter, sister, friend, wife, mother, boss, and on it goes. In these many layers of identity, we share attributes both positive and negative. Learning to accept of “Self” means that we need to accept our strengths as well as our flaws.
In this HerStory, the fair maiden transitions into a very different character as she faces her shadows… and embraces enlightenment.
NOTE: Since its kind of an autobiography, I flip from first- to third-person, to explain the story in more relevant detail.
The Fair Maiden
I was a lucky one. I was born into a large family with two dedicated parents, in a small, safe Midwestern town where everyone knew everyone. It was wholesome, predictable, and unfettered by real-life problems.
As an archetypal description, however, a fair maiden represents more than idealistic purity. There is a shadow part too. A fair maiden believes everything that she is told. In her controlled environment, there isn’t room for other viewpoints. Fair maidens choose to remain naive to avoid the difficult process of forming personal opinions or of accepting the consequences of her choices.
Many women spend their entire life in this archetypal mode. Yes, you can be a 60-year-old fair maiden! When we allow others to call the shots, when we close our eyes to the real world and remain imprisoned by our fear of the unknown… when we fail to stand up for ourselves or others who need our strength… then we are falling back into this role. Fair maidens need to wake up and face up to their collective feminine responsibilities.
Women in general, are social creatures. We lean on the approval of others to define our value. Making change often requires us to challenge our social networks. Fear of being ostracized by family, friends, and religious affiliations often forces women to remain “stuck.” For those brave souls break free, alienation is a real danger. In the story, the Desparado’s heart is broken and her support systems abandon her and fear takes over. She loses the ability to see clearly and feel her intuition in order to make wise decisions.
But for those who have travelled this stormy sea, you know the real secret about this phase of life: that when the heart is broken, it is also more open to receive. It can be the worst of time, but also the best. Emotions feel bigger, music sounds better, human connections are more meaningful… and transformation inevitable!
As healing strengthens her resolve, the pirate emerges! She begins to wake up and see the truths, and takes the action required to protect what is hers. Badass Pirates are women raising kids alone, making a living, finding her way in the world. She does not have time to worry about what other people think and is unwilling to carry their emotional baggage anymore.
As pirates we “take no prisoners.” We can say NO and mean it. We can get directly to the point instead of being too “nice.” The challenge for a pirate, is to balance her aggression with a loving heart. We realize that feminine strength is often misunderstood, but regardless - and with practice - our boundaries are firm, fair and consistent. In this vibration, we learn to appreciate a higher connection to our souls and attract those who share this energy.
In this archetypal phase, we begin to see with perspective. The Captain embraces all aspects of her Self. Every lesson is a blessing, shaping character with each success and failure. Her life is built to withstand the ebb and flow of life’s challenges and she realizes she no longer needs to be a pirate, forging her riches forcefully.
She is the Captain of her own life.
From this place of command, she can see with clarity.Magnanimous energy elevates her vibration to a place of gratitude where abundance flows effortlessly and endlessly. Sharing her wisdom and bounty collected from her journey becomes her purpose, and ultimately (when her earthly experience is over) becomes her legacy.