Answering My Why
As you reach for your star know that you are inspiring others to find their own.
Sharing “practical inspiration” is my purpose, but it took me quite a while to discover this. I spent the first 40 years of my life learning the lessons (sometimes painfully) that I write about in my blog, books, and social media. I share my struggles so that my readers know that life wasn’t always peachy keen for me either.
Life didn’t really come together until my 5th decade. During that time, I sold my art business and then helped build my husband’s business to a place where we could afford to hire appropriate staff. I was able to step out of the working world and by that time our kids were out of the house. Retirement! I had reached the end of the working/parenting rainbow! AHHHHH!
Like many others, I had dreamt of retirement for most of my working career. Now, monday morning was “Easy Like Sunday Morning” (sorry if you are too young to understand that musical reference). I used to envy those who had an abundance of time and resources and NOW was my time! For the first six months, I did all of the things that I never had time to do before. I cooked elaborate meals (three hours of prep, five minutes of eating and then an hour of clean up). I decluttered, reorganized, remodeled, landscaped. I took on exercise like I was training for an athletic event.
But then it started to nag at me, right around six months into my retirement, which I documented in my journals. “It” was the question; “NOW WHAT?”
Again and again, my soul kept asking and I started to question my worth. Was “my place” in this world, for the rest of my life, to use up resources; the air, food, water, material things, just "consume" until I die?
(I know, I know, a little dramatic but that’s how I think)
The answer started to creep into my conscience as I was driving to an appointment with a pop music station playing in the background. I had asked the universe, “What do you want from me?”
Side note: There is something about driving and letting my mind wander, I dunno, but I’ve done so much deep thinking/daydreaming/soul searching behind the wheel (sorry other drivers). A psychic once told me that my soul leaves my body when I’m driving!
And repetitively I would receive an unlikely message from the radio in the form of the popular song by Kings of Leon, “Use Somebody”
And it wouldn’t just happen in the car. This would happen at home. In stores and offices. Over and again, to the point that I would laugh out loud. Everytime I "asked" this song "answered." I would listen to the words trying to make sense but it would bring me to tears instead. I would shake it off as coincidence ... wishful thinking or projection or narcissism. If that was my answer, I didn’t understand.
I’ve come to realize that the universe is patient and very diligent. (I’m sure the “powers-that-be” felt like they were training a chicken.) “Lots and lots of repetition,” they’d mutter, “Eventually she WILL get it.”
I believe there is a metaphysical/psychological rationalization. I feel that we connect the dots that we want to connect! We see what we choose, and hear what we select. In this case, I believed that I was receiving direction in the words;
“I could use somebody, someone like you.”
Oprah says a prayer everyday, "Use me, God. Show me how to take who I am, who I want to be, and what I can do, and use it for a purpose greater than myself.”
I decided to TRUST the message that I was receiving (choosing?)... my life’s work is to use my art and words to encourage others to A) embrace the mystical, magical aspects of manifesting, and B) make the courageous changes to create the life that calls.
Through this experience, I know that my life - and the work of my purpose - is just beginning!
As we reach for more we discover there is more to life than meets the eye. ~KAt